Happy Day Before Halloween, my special bookish tweeters! I promised you to release the second part to my bookish tweets-piece from last time, so here it is – and just the day before Halloween too… To keep this intro short so you can get to the tweet-y goodness, you will be served several tweets: so not just the usual seven, but also three more added into our main course, plus even a few set aside as a treat for sticking to the end – and also as a little thanks for treating instead of tricking this year!
So, without further delay, let’s get to the tweet treats…
Extreme Home Makeover
Have you ever wanted to design your very own home and may even have taken a quiz on it as though you were actually planning it? The only catch is doing it all on a certain (and extremely limited) budget. So, try doing that now using these prices…
You have $15 to build your dream home
$100 – A home gym
$250 – Granite countertops
$10 – A housekeeper who hates you
$4 – Probably haunted
$1 – Also your husband may have murdered his first wife
$500 – A pool— SparkNotes (@SparkNotes) October 21, 2020
If you have good prioritization, I’m sure that was a breeze to get through, right?
Eyes Without A Face
If you’ve seen a strange face before, one that really sticks out at you whether you like it or not, chances are: you will see that face again. You just never know where…
— SparkNotes (@SparkNotes) October 22, 2020
Who knows? That face (most notably their eyes) may pop up in your dreams tonight, maybe as a sign that your neighbor/new best friend is about to be murdered the very next day…
What Women Want
If you’re a guy, chances are that you have wondered at some point what women want. Well, luckily for you, here’s a special inside tip about what they truly want…
Women only want one thing and it's to escape from the secret room on the third floor and set fires
— SparkNotes (@SparkNotes) October 23, 2020
Risky, I know, but if you truly want her heart, you have to put yourself out there and go get that for her! For the sake of love, man: just do it!
So You Think You Can Poe
And now, a word from our sponsor about all the exciting autumn activities you can do during spooky season…
It's fall! You know what that means:
– Apple picking
– Hay rides
– Sweaters
– Reading anything by Edgar Allan Poe and being forced to come to terms with the inevitability of death as well as the perils of idealization
– Pumpkins
– Flannel— SparkNotes (@SparkNotes) October 23, 2020
Careful though: you don’t want to out-Poe the OG Poe! Otherwise, you’ll get the chance to go visit him.
That Special Something
If you’re a bookworm, there’s a good chance that you’ve come across that special character who you love almost right away and you don’t know exactly what it is about them that makes them stand out to you…
Jane Austen describing the Bennet daughter who just so happens to share her name pic.twitter.com/AE1erSBbIN
— SparkNotes (@SparkNotes) October 26, 2020
No… that can’t be it.
Who’s The Fairest Befall-er Of All?
Have you ever wondered what omen you would be according to your zodiac sign? Well, not anymore! Introducing…
The signs as ominous signs
Aries: A flock of crows
Taurus: Fog
Gemini: A candle goes out
Cancer: Fleeing animals
Leo: A coming storm
Virgo: Church bells
Libra: Plague
Scorpio: Red sky
Sagittarius: A comet
Capricorn: Prophetic dreams
Aquarius: Latin chanting
Pisces: A full moon— SparkNotes (@SparkNotes) October 26, 2020
Watch out, Coronavirus: there’s a new widespread disease in town, and it’s me, the Plague!
The One Job
Do you know someone who would constantly mess up, no matter what simple task you give them to do? Well, no matter who they are, I’m sure they hadn’t screwed up this badly…
Look, when I said I would "do anything" to bring Eurydice back from the Underworld I obviously meant "besides walk in a straight line without turning around"
— SparkNotes (@SparkNotes) October 27, 2020
… and if they have, then I think it’s worth repeating this to them: you had one job!
The Best Friend Ever
Think of your closest friend for a second. Now, I want you to remember the nicest thing that they had ever done for you. Now, hold that thought as you read through this personal testimony…
After 2 weeks of multiple health screens and asking everyone to quarantine, I surprised my closest inner circle with a trip to a private island where we could pretend things were normal just for a brief moment in time. pic.twitter.com/IhaBpv2dWa
— SparkNotes (@SparkNotes) October 27, 2020
Now, does that nice thing your friend did for you top that? And don’t try to steal this idea from them to surprise your own friends with, because no one likes a good idea hog.
The Most Relatable There Ever Was…
Count on your fingers right now to see how many literary characters you can relate to. Now, put your hands down and see if this was one of your characters…
The most relatable character in Hamlet is the ghost of Hamlet's dad
– Refuses to speak in front of large groups
– Just wears the same thing all the time
– Asks for huge favors and does nothing in return
– Doomed to suffer in sulph'rous and tormenting flames— SparkNotes (@SparkNotes) October 28, 2020
This is all the more reason why Hamlet’s dead dad is one of the most underrated characters in all of classic literature!
The Perfect Costume (And The Perfect Excuse)
Don’t get out much, but also don’t like it when other people judge you for it and then try to coax you into going outside every once in a while? (I know that feeling…) For Halloween this year, try this on them…
I'm not "just staying home this year," I'm going as Boo Radley
— SparkNotes (@SparkNotes) October 30, 2020
Come on, don’t tell me you haven’t at least thought about it! And the best part is: you won’t have to come out unless the neighbors you’ve known for years from afar are in great danger!
Now, for the (extra) bonus tweets…
Bonus Tweet: The Repeater
I’m sure you have at least one person in your life – friend or not – who constantly repeats everything they say, and it gets to be really annoying after a while…
I've said it before and I'll say it again: nevermore
— SparkNotes (@SparkNotes) October 29, 2020
And if this is true and they are your friend, why?
Bonus Tweet #2: Choose Your Own Vamp-Venture
Let’s do a little role-playing exercise…
Vampires are taking over England! Choose your starter:
– A real estate agent
– A doctor who just so happens to know a lot about vampires
– A clever schoolteacher
– A socialite who gets three proposals in one day
– A psychiatrist
– A wealthy lord
– A literal cowboy— SparkNotes (@SparkNotes) October 29, 2020
Now, go off on your quest, have fun, and don’t get bitten: you don’t know where those vampires have been.
Bonus Tweet #3: You’re The Expert
If, in the near future, you somehow wind up having to make a deal with the devil, consult this expert…
The Picture of Dorian Gray (1890) pic.twitter.com/4SVD7mDgaM
— SparkNotes (@SparkNotes) October 30, 2020
Now, does that look like the face of a person living in misery for what they’ve done?
Featured Image Made via Photoshop













